The Aftermath of the Kidnapping
by TotalCSIfan
Summary: Everyone thinks about what Nick went through with his kidnapping but what about what it was like for Jackie? Please read and review!


Disclaimer: I own nothing of CSI

The Aftermath of the Kidnapping

Jackie's cell phone started ringing on her nightstand in the middle of the night. She glanced at the clock on her dresser and it read 1:30. Jackie felt her heart pound as she reached for the phone, she knew at this hour it must be an emergency. She glanced at the caller ID on her phone and it read Miranda.

Miranda was one of Jackie's good friends from work, Miranda taught third grade at the same school Jackie taught at and she lived just within a few blocks from Jackie.

Miranda just recently had her first baby, a little girl named Lily, or as Jackie called her Lily Lou. Miranda's husband Mike had recently became a cop for a tiny town just outside of Vegas, and like Nick he worked the graveyard shift.

Jackie relaxed a little bit as she answered the phone. _"The baby must be cranky and she can't calm her down."_ Jackie thought to herself as she answered.

Jackie remembered back to when she had just had Jasmine, there were several phone calls in the middle of the night that Jackie had made to her mom to ask her for advice when Nick was working.

"Hello." Jackie answered the phone trying to sound cheerful despite the hour.

"Hi Jackie, I'm so sorry to call you this late but I just really needed to talk to somebody."

"It's no problem, is the kiddo not sleeping?" Jackie asked.

"Yeah she is, it's not about the baby, I just really need to talk to someone."

"Ok, what's going on?" Jackie asked.

"I know it's a lot to ask but could I come over for a bit?"

Jackie noticed she sounded like she was crying.

"Sure." Jackie said.

"Thank you, I'll see you in a bit."

After that the phone call ended and so Jackie got up to make a pot of coffee. She then turned on the porch light and waited for her friend to arrive.

"Hi." Jackie greeted when she arrived.

"Hi, thanks so much." Miranda said.

"Sure, no problem, come in." Jackie told her.

Miranda pulled back the blanket that was coving the baby in her car seat and was relived that the infant was still sleeping peacefully.

Jackie led Miranda to the kitchen table.

"Coffee?" Jackie asked.

"Yes, please." Jackie poured two cups of coffee and then brought them to the table.

"So what's going on?" Jackie asked.

"I don't know how you do it, I'm losing my mind, and it doesn't help that I'm a hormonal mess." Miranda said.

Jackie noticed that her friend's eyes then switched to the stairs. Jackie followed her gaze and saw Houston standing at the top of the stairs.

"Dada?" the little boy asked sleepily.

"Sorry." Miranda said apologetically to Jackie.

"No big deal, I'll be right back." Jackie said as she got up and walked up the stairs.

"No sweetheart, it's not daddy, let's get you back to sleep." Jackie said as she picked up the little boy.

"Yeah, tire." Houston agreed, happily letting Jackie carry him back to his room.

"You're tired?" Jackie asked sympathetically.

"Yeah." Houston said.

Jackie smiled and ruffled his hair before she laid him back down in his bed.

"Goodnight sweet boy, mommy loves you." She said as she tucked him in, kissed his forehead and then walked out of the room.

"Ok, sorry about that, now where were we?" Jackie asked as she sat back down at her table.

"I don't know what to do, I'm just a mess, I feel like I am losing my mind."

"I know how you feel, it's hard when you have your first baby, and it must be even harder without any family around for support."

"No, that's not what I mean. I meant about my husband's job."

"Yeah, it's hard when you are alone at night with a baby." Jackie agreed.

"No, I didn't mean because of the baby, I meant because of his profession. I'm going crazy, I just worry about him all the time, I'm not sleeping, eating, all I do is lay awake at night worrying that I am going to get a phone call about him getting hurt, or worse, and since I've had the baby I'm worrying even more, I mean if something happens to him now, it doesn't just effect me, it effects Lily too. How do you deal with it Jackie, how do you not lose your mind, especially because you've gotten a phone call like that on more than one occasion."

"It's hard, but I think the biggest thing that helps keep me sane is the people my husband works with, I trust them completely, and so does Nick. I know that if something goes wrong they will always have his back, they are more like a family then they are coworkers which helps keep my mind somewhat at ease."

"That's good, I hope that after my husband is a cop for a while I'll develop that same trust level with is coworkers too."

"I hope you do too." Jackie said.

"You know, after Nick's kidnapping I was a mess, I didn't sleep or eat, and just like you I would lay awake at night and worry about my phone ringing in the middle of the night, my job even started to suffer as a result. I was a zombie for about three months after. I even seriously considered getting a divorce. Not because I didn't love Nick anymore, and not because I didn't want to be married anymore but because I loved him so much that the thought of him getting killed was more than I could handle. I didn't really talk about my feelings with him very much during this time because he was going through his own hell, I didn't want to stress him out any more than he already was. I asked him to retire on several occasions but when he wouldn't I left it at that and didn't tell him how I was feeling, he also didn't discuss how he was feeling with me, I think because he wanted to protect me from all the awful details, but that didn't help matters at all. I wanted to be supportive but he wouldn't talk to me about anything so I didn't know how to be there for him"

"Wow Jackie, I had no idea you had ever even considered a divorce, that shocks me, everyone I know, including myself, look at you and Nick as the ideal couple, to think that your marriage was that rocky at one point was something that I never would have expected. If you don't mind me asking, why did you change your mind and not get a divorce?"

"I finally sat down with my dad and told him how I was feeling, and how I was so worried every day that I couldn't even sleep at night. I told him that I couldn't live that way any longer and that I was seriously considering getting a divorce. I'll never forget what he told me, he looked me in the eye and said _Jackie, your mother and I have a great marriage, there is only one couple that I know of that have a stronger bond than her and I, and that couple is you and Nick. You can't throw that away just because you are worried about the what-ifs in life. Anything can happen to any of us at any given moment, but we can't let that stop us from living our lives, and we certainly shouldn't let it separate us from the ones that are the most dear to us. You need to sit down with Nick and tell him how you feel. The two of you love each other more than anything, that's obvious, he'll help calm your fears and you can help calm his, but the one thing you can't do is turn your back on each other right now, as hard as it may be, you need to make this terrible experience strengthen your marriage, not tear it apart_. I went home that night and sat down with Nick and told him how I was feeling. The next day he took a leave of absence from his job. We immediately started couple's counseling and it did wonders. Nick also started going to therapy to help him through the aftermath of his kidnapping, and I went to every session with him to show him that I was with him every step of the way. When he did go back to work it was difficult for me at first, but I found things to help me cope."

"Like what?"

"Well, for one, since the day he went back to work after taking his leave of absence, no matter what, Nick always makes sure I'm awake before he leaves at night. It doesn't matter if I'm sleeping or not, if I'm sleeping he wakes me up, and before he leaves for work we make sure that the very last thing we say to each other is _I love you_, the night he was kidnapped, I was asleep when he left for work and he was trying to be nice and let me sleep and so he didn't wake me up to tell me goodbye. As they were searching for him the fact that I hadn't told him I loved him before he left for work that night devastated me, had he not been saved that would have haunted me forever. If God forbid something were to happen to him and he didn't come home I now would at least have comfort in the fact that the very last thing we said to each other was _I love you._ Actually, before he leaves for work I always say _I love you_ and his response back to me is always _I love you more."_

"That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard." Miranda said.

Jackie smiled and then said "After he went back to work and I couldn't sleep I'd just call him on the phone. If he didn't answer right then he'd call me back as soon as he could, and it gave me peace of mind just to hear his voice. I still have to do that sometimes, but he doesn't mind at all."

"I might have to do that, and without fail from now on the last thing I say to my husband before he leaves at night is going to be _I love you_, what a wonderful idea."

"Good, I'm glad I could help at least somewhat."

"You've helped way more than somewhat, thank you so much."

"Sure, and if you ever need someone to talk to I'm always here, you can call me anytime."

"Thanks Jackie." Miranda said before she got up and gave Jackie a hug.

Miranda then gathered up all of her and the baby's things and then left the house.

Jackie watched her get into her car and drive away, and then she promptly went back to bed.

The End! Don't forget to leave a review!


End file.
